Fake it Till You Make It – Just A Bunch Of Hype?

Excerpts taken from the book“The Triad Of Unbreakable Confidence”

Do you ever feel really awkward when trying something new or trying to act confident when you really just feel discouraged, depressed or let down? If this rings a bell, you may appreciate this tool’s ability to help refocus your attention effectively in minutes.

Several studies like the famous Smile Study published by the University of Berkeley have proven unequivocally that when you simply fake doing something that feels unnatural, but is good for you, it eventually becomes natural and results in positive outcomes.

According to the study, patients who were diagnosed as “clinically depressed” were instructed to sit in front of a three-way mirror and fake a smile from ear to ear for 4 weeks, 20 minutes per day. At the end of the study no one needed medication and not one patient could say that they were still depressed.

So what’s happening here? Basically, if you fake something long enough, the old neural connections, which made you fearful, will break off and die while new empowering memory associations will take over. Ultimately if you fake being more confident, you will become what you once thought you were faking, “more confident” and as a result attract more women.

Want more proof? Amy Cuddy, a social psychologist who teaches at Harvard Business School has proven scientifically how faking something as simple as power posing increases testosterone, lowers cortisol and makes you more confident.

If you’re unfamiliar with it, Power Posing is basically just making yourself bigger by physically taking up more space. Here are some examples of power posing:

  • Hold your hands over your head like you just won the main event at the Olympics.
  • Stand tall with your hands on your hips with elbows flaring out like Superman.
  • Sit with your legs open and your hands interlaced behind your head, elbows flaring out.

All of these poses increase testosterone, lower cortisol and make you more confident. So what’s happening here? Similar to the animal kingdom where a snake or a bear will rise up and make itself larger to fend off a threat, we too can display these signs of confidence not only in dangerous situations but in situations where a potential mate needs to see that you are a confident and worthy mate.

Cuddy became interested in the study of how faking something can create successful results when she herself experienced a traumatic accident as a young lady and was thrown from a car, which resulted in brain damage. Previous to the accident, she had been called “a gifted child student” and completely lost her identity when her IQ dropped several points after the accident. After battling back she got into Princeton University on the recommendation of what she calls an “angel advisor,” but came to a crossroads when asked to give her first presentation to a small audience of 20 people.

Feeling as if she was an unworthy imposter and certain she would fail, Amy went to her advisor who took a chance on her and told her she was going to quit. Her advisor quipped back: “You are not quitting because I took a gamble on you and you’re staying. You’re gonna stay and this is what you’re going to do. You are gonna fake it, you’re gonna do every talk that you’re ever asked to do. You’re gonna do it, and do it, and do it even if you’re terrified and just paralyzed and having an out of body experience, until you have this moment when you say oh my gosh, I’m actually doing it, I have become this, I am actually doing this.”

Of course you can guess what happened next. Cuddy faked it until she became it and next thing we know she’s teaching at Harvard Business School, doing a Ted Talk now viewed by over 40 million people. Pretty inspiring right? Basically, her conclusions of her studies of faking something until you become it were this:

“Our bodies change our minds and our minds can change our behavior and our behavior changes our outcomes.”

She also discovered that faking power poses makes people more “assertive, confident and comfortable vs. those who did the opposite by shrinking and became highly reactive. Of course she also found with no surprise that the best leaders have high testosterone and low cortisol (low reaction to stress).  Here is the video below:

Excerpts taken from the book “The Triad Of Unbreakable Confidence”

Learn How To Chant Om Mani Padme Hum

Looking for inner power?  Try Om Mani Padme Hum

Mantra: Om Mani Padme Hum

Translation: “Jewel in the lotus.” This comes from an ancient Buddhist parable “Gem in the Robe,” where a man lives his life in poverty until he discovers he has a priceless jewel sewn into his robe.

Effect: It represents the inner power you possess, which, similar to Nam Myoho Renge Kyo, is activated by chanting the mantra

How to do it:

How To Chant The Mantra Om Namah Shivaya

Looking for calm, peace, concentration and focus?  Try Om Namah Shivaya

Mantra: Om Namah Shivaya
Translation: “I bow to Shiva, the supreme deity of transformation who represents the truest, highest self,” or “I honor the divinity within myself.”

Effect: Shiva was a he, an all powerful mythical man deity, so chanting this is a great mantra to help build self-confidence and reminds us that we are all made up of divine energy and should treat ourselves accordingly.

How to do it:

Nam Myoho Renge Kyo – The Key To The Universe?

In my own practice, I have benefited from the power of chanting a mantra, because it keeps me focused and prevents me from losing concentration. By far, my favorite mantra is Nam Myoho Renge Kyo. Why? Because it feels like throwing out a 1,000 pound anchor in a sea of confusion and hitting the bottom instantly. At that point I feel anchored, stable, confident and can access all the power and answers to life’s most puzzling questions.

For me this mantra just rolls of the tongue, but you’ll have to test it out for yourself and see how it resonates with you. Again, many people who find it hard to focus in silent meditation do really well with this active form of meditation.

Created by Nichiren Daishonin, a 13th Century Japanese Monk, this mantra is the Japanese translation of the original “Lotus Sutra” the Historical Buddha “Shakyamuni Buddha’s” highest teaching. As described previously, Nichiren, like Jesus, Shakyamuni, Martin Luther King Jr. and Gandhi was a wanted man for spreading truth and had several attempts on his life, but his legacy lives on in this mantra, which is chanted by millions of people worldwide.

Translation: Nam, as in the first part of the Indian word Namaste is devotion or bow in reverence. Myo is mystic as in the “unseen power” and its latent effect and Ho is physical as in the seen or physical effects we see from a cause. Renge is the Lotus Flower, which is rare because it blooms and seeds at the same time, which represents the simultaneity of cause and effect as explained earlier. And finally Kyo, which has various translations, but in this case it’s both sound vibration and the Buddha’s teaching.

So in essence when we chant we create a vibration which is profoundly significant since it is the law (cause and effect) by which all other laws are governed and taught by the original Buddha some 3,000 years ago.

In other words, when we chant Nam Myoho Renge Kyo by saying it repeatedly, we are saying “I believe in cause and effect and I am the captain of my destiny. By chanting this phrase I can access all the answers I need.”

Effect: This mantra when chanted with sincerity is meant to unlock your inherent Buddhahood (infinite confidence, courage, wisdom & compassion) and gain the ability to perceive the true nature of all phenomena. This sound vibration adds a completely different element from silent meditation as science has now shown that everything vibrates at a certain frequency and those frequencies have different effects.

While some will debate, hopefully by now you’re beginning to see that cause and effect is the law by which all other laws are governed and accordingly, the frequency of its vibration while chanting it is indeed powerful and can help you to access all points in space and time. Yes, to transcend space and time. Ok, if you’re still tripping on any of this, take a deep breath.

Remember, we’ve already talked about how each cause has a latent effect that is unseen and may come back at a later time, which means you are transcending time. And we’ve already talked about how science has proven that you can transcend geographic location and effect things with your thoughts and their accompanying vibration. At this point it’s time to dispel any remaining doubts by simply trying it out and seeing for yourself if it resonates with you.

How to do it: Yes there is an organization of practitioners and no you don’t have to join it, but if you find it interesting you can explore that later on